Category Archives: Reality is Weird

French Government Releases Its OVNI (UFO) Files to the Web

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The official French governmental group in charge of investigating UFOs (or OVNI — Objet Volant Non Identifié — as they’re commonly known in France) has publicly released what it claims are all of its files to the Web, including graphics, audio, and video recordings. (But I guess that would not include the evidence that UFO researcher, computer scientist, and noted author Jacques Vallée witnessed being destroyed in 1961.)

The Web site — at http://www.cnes-geipan.fr/geipan/ — has been completely overwhelmed by visitors (terrestrial, albeit virtual), and at this writing is frequently not accessible at all due to the load.

The collection numbers some 100,000 documents, spanning more than 50 years and incorporating 1,650 cases and approximately 6,000 witness reports, plus police and expert reports, witness sketches, maps, photos and video and audio recordings. According to the group’s director, Jacques Patenet, 25-28 percent (depending on which news story you read) are classified as “Class D aerospace phenomena,” defined as “inexplicable despite precise testimonies and the (good) quality of material information gathered.” This is roughly equivalent to the percentage of unexplainable cases in the old Project Blue Book As reported by the Associated Press, “Only 9 percent of France’s strange phenomena have been fully explained, the agency said. Experts found likely reasons for another 33 percent, and 30 percent could not be identified for lack of information.”

The oldest report in the French archives reportedly dates to 1937, 17 years before the formal French investigations began.

Regrettably, the site’s basic navigation requires JavaScript and Ajax support in order to function, which means no outside search engine indexing (sorry Google) and, actually, that it’s probably in violation of the EU’s Web accessibility standards.

The French space agency CNES was first charged with investigating UFOs in 1954, but apparently it did not form a specific group for that purpose in 1977. It is currently known as GEIPAN (Groupe d’Etudes et d’Information des Phénomènes Aérospatiaux Non identifiés, or the Group for Study and Information on Unidentified Aerospace Phenomena), it has undergone several name changes over the years. At its formation in 1977, it was called GEPAN (Groupement d’Etude des Phénomènes Aérospatiaux Non-identifiés). In 1988 it was replaced by SEPRA (Service d’Expertise des Phénomènes de Rentrées Atmosphériques), privatized (I think) in 1999 and re-christened Service d’Expertise des Phénomènes Rares Aérospatiaux (allowing it to keep its old acronym). The current GEIPAN organization was created in 2005.

You can read some GEPAN/SEPRA/GEIPAN-related documents and news articles over at UFOevidence.org. There’s also a French-language page at the Les Découvertes Impossibles site (Google translate-o-tron link) that includes an organizational timeline and numerous papers and publications issued by GEPAN from 1979-1983, available in both HTML and PDF formats.

Bon appetit, mes étrangers. As an apéritif, here’s a Google auto-translated version of the CNES press release announcing the formation of GEIPAN in 2005:

PARIS, 28.9. 2005
CP 075 – 2005

A STEERING COMMITTEE FOR THE FOLLOW-UP OF THE ACTIVITIES
DEPENDENT ON THE AEROSPACE PHENOMENA NOT IDENTIFY

To supervise and control the activity of follow-up of the Not identified Aerospace Phenomena (SIDE) and a policy of information in this field, it was decided to constitute a Steering committee of which the first meeting was held on September 22, 2005 with the CNES.

The activity of the CNES concerning the Not identified Aerospace Phenomena comprises three shutters:

  • collection, seizure and the filing of the reports/ratios in order to maintain and to manage a data base (activity CNES),
  • analysis of this information by calling upon correspondents in the fields and disciplines concerned,
  • the communication with public interested, publication of periodic reports/ratios and the management of the access to the files.

The Steering committee, chaired by Mr. Yves Sillard, old Directing General of the CNES, former Delegate General for the Armament, is made up:

  • representatives of the CNES: the Deputy manager of the Center of Toulouse, the Director of the External Communication, Education and the Public affairs, in charge one of mission for the ethical questions,
  • representatives of the organizations with which the CNES collaborates in this field: National gendarmerie, National police force, Air Force, Civil Safety, Civil aviation, Weather-France,
  • researchers invited by the President of the CNES in agreement with the President of the Steering committee.

At its first meeting, the Committee recommended the installation or the reactualization of draft-agreements between the CNES and the Organizations partners. It underlined the need for a policy transparent and recommended the creation of an Internet site with setting on line of information available, in the respect of the legislation in force.

The Steering committee will meet as a need and at least twice a year on convocation for its President. Person in charge CNES in load for the SIDE activity will submit an annual review article to the Steering committee as well as a progress report at semi-year. The CNES will address the annual review article to its supervisions accompanied by the presentations and recommendations by the steering committee.

The Cadaver Synod

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I know the Catholic Church has some rather, uh, interesting history, but this item (via Metafilter) about The Cadaver Synod of 897 AD really impressed me. Excerpts:

The trial began when the disinterred corpse of [Pope] Formosus was carried into the courtroom. On Stephen VII’s orders the putrescent corpse, which had been lying in its tomb for seven months, had been dressed in full pontifical vestments. The dead body was then propped up in a chair behind which stood a teenage deacon, quaking with fear, whose unenviable responsibility was to defend Formosus by speaking in his behalf. … Stephen VII screamed and raved, hurling insults at and mocking the rotting corpse. Occasionally, when the furious torrent of execrations and maledictions would die down momentarily, the deacon would stammer out a few words weakly denying the charges … The sentence imposed by Stephen VII was that all Formosus’s acts and ordinations as pope be invalidated, that the three fingers of Formosus’s right hand used to give papal blessings be hacked off, and that the body be stripped of its papal vestments, clad in the cheap garments of a lay person, and buried in a common grave.

…The appalling trial and the savage mistreatment of Formosus’s corpse provoked so much anger and outrage in Rome that within a few months there was a palace revolution and Stephen VII was deposed, stripped of his gorgeous pope’s clothing and required to dress as a monk, imprisoned, and, some time in August 897, strangled.

Believe it or not, the tale does not end even there. Read more here… BTW, the MeFi post also includes a pointer to Steven Lahey’s cartoon telling.

Amazingly, this episode apparently made nary a dent or ding in the doctrine of papal infallibility. Then again, maybe not so amazing.

Just Some Stuff

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Ye olde WFMU Blog has recently posted two Concertos for Jew’s Harp (then known as the guimbarde) composed by Johann Georg Albrechstberger (who once taught some guy named Beethoven) apparently to please his patron, Austrian king Joseph II, who was evidently a fan of the instrument. It’s nice stuff, once one gets past the inevitable giggles from hearing “boing boing twaanggg” amidst the more familiar orchestral arrangements. And why the heck is that thing called a “Jew’s harp” anyway?

There’s also a recent pointer to a jaw-dropping Quicktime VR tour of “Steve’s Weird House,” a Victorian mansion somewhere in Seattle jammed stem to stern with, well, just about everything in the universe (especially if it’s odd). Methinks the man could make a fortune if he charged admission. Must be seen to be believed.

Time Migraine, er, Magazine is currently accepting online voting for their Person of the Year. Candidates include Hugo Chavez, Gee Duh-bya, Kim Jong Il and “the YouTube guys.” Hm.

The reprobate running Seattle’s own Wall of Sound record shoppe recently tipped me to a very fine live 1970 TV performance of “11 Mustachioed Daughters” by biG GRunt (via YouTube), a post-Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band whatsis fronted by Vivian Stanshall (whose very British piece of very surreal comedy, Sir Henry at Rawlinson End (1980), recently appeared on the shelves at Scarecrow Video). Anything featuring a leg-theremin solo and homebrew robot sidemen is worth some peeper time. Btw, the YouTube clip does look better if you use the handy shrinker-izer button. You can learn more about biG GRunt at the Ginger Geezer site (which does not constitute a rabbit). And speaking of Dog Doo-Dahs and biG GRunts, Neil Innes’ web site offers a very fat bowl of MP3 and streaming Real audio floaters, including 8 songs recorded live in Chicago in 2004 and mastered by none other than Pink Bob.

Meanwhile, Pixar has posted all of their short films online for your streaming pleasure.

Also, one Dan Lamoureux is entering post-production on his nerdcore documentary. Like a DQ Blizzard, baby.

But for some real learning, visit the Intergalactic Research – Space is the Place site/blog (or its earlier incarnation at Blogspot), in particular their collection of extremely rare Sun Ra interview and conversation audio. Much of the downloads are only via the thoroughly aggravating and grossly misnamed Rapidshare site, but there is a pointer to a 2 hour interview (in 3 parts, MP4) easily downloadable from the Slought Foundation site. While you’re getting schooled, you should poke around the lengthy discographies at Space is the Place, where you will find many links to choice MP3s…albeit at that dag blasted Rapidshare.

Okay, done now.

Smoke on the Syrup, or, How I Missed the Time Warp

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Monday morning. Ugh. Feel like I’ve been sleeping on sticks. I spent Sunday cocooned — didn’t leave the house, no radio, no TV (except for a DVD or three), no newspaper, no email (I don’t think)…just coffee, the muse, and later some spaghetti. I don’t even bother with 60 Minutes.

As I’m falling asleep, I remember I have to go to the bank. Crap. That means being Late For Work, and lately my employer is a stickler about that. Now suddenly it’s 8:30 and for NPR, Shea Stevens is telling me the headlines. Snooze. Man, I could use another hour of sleep. Radio again. Crap okay okay I stand up, bump into a couple walls, then call in to my boss. Except, huh that’s kinda odd, no one’s at the switchboard. (Am I awake yet?) Well, receptionists need late, too, so whatever. Ain’t the first time. I use the spell-finder whatsis and leave a message for my manager. “Hi, it’s me. It’s, er, ten to 9 and I’m afraid I have to go to the bank. Everything’s covered…” etc. The radio’s all election blah blah, so I shower and while shaving there’s another top of the hour.

And there’s this “public service” story during the local headline news slot about how now that we’ve lost an hour, to be extra careful driving in the dark.

Oh. Right. Fall back. Fuuuuck.

The whole time change thing remains strange and jarring to me even though I’m now 40 and have spent more than half my life in places where the time changes twice every year. I guess everyone feels about the same about it (bearish), but I grew up in central Indiana, where the time never changed — never had, never would. What was the point? The days were still shorter or longer or whatever. Big deal. All that corn still grows in rows. Since there was no time change, what time shows were on TV would shift an hour one way or the other, depending on the season. It was like school that way, what time the Muppet Show and Emergency were on. A sure sign of impending winter. I remember when I moved to Chicago at the age of (only just) 19 and the utterly bizarre and hard-to-describe-and-despite-myself thrill of the first time I experienced a time change. It was ridiculous in its pomposity, especially sitting next to a small inland sea. Perhaps not coincidentally, the local PBS affiliate later showed Dr. Who during late night.

So…anyway, an unexpected hour until the bank opens, and me all dressed up with nowhere to go. Fug it. Have me some big breffast. I buy a paper and stroll into my neighborhood breakfast franchise establishment. Get seated. Hm. Kinda chilly in here. Oh hi, yeah I’ll have the Western skillet thing, that sounds good thanks. Coffee arrives, I’m sipping the paper, and I smell that early season furnace smell of gently roasting dust and settled cat hair. Sense memory takes over, and I feel peripherally transported to a dozen previous autumns of my life all at once.

Gradually, between sips, I become aware that the slightly chilled IHOP dining room is slowly filling with an increasingly dense carpet of white smoke from, oh, about mid-thigh on down. It’s like my dad’s pipe smoke when I was a kid.

Looking around, the few other tables are all taking no apparent notice, and then I see the one waiter climbing up on the ticket station and fiddling with the beige (once white) box at the base of the beige (once white) vaulted ceiling, then climbing down and walking briskly in seemingly random ellipses. There’s a cell phone flourish and then back up again. That thermostat looks like it’s probably kinda greasy.

“Yeah, I cranked the heat and this is what happened,” he answers my Customer’s Brow as he shuttles past in the now rather endearingly Scottish moor-like white fog and opens the exterior door-to-a-pit near me. “Sorry about this, but I’ll close this in 5 or 10 min.” Yeah man, it’s all good. Sip. The business casual guy on the other side of the floor chortles for some reason.

Breakfast arrives with precisely 15 min. until the bank opens, as the chill smokey breeze wafts through with the sound of passing morning traffic.

Sip. Reminds me I’ve been meaning to dig out my gloves. Mm, I’m glad the pancakes come with after all.

I tip the waiter extra well when I leave, smack on the dot. Turns out the other guy who was supposed to work hasn’t showed up. Figures, don’t it, hang in there man. As I walk out the door, I’m suddenly 23 and working in a coffee house again.

Solar Transit of the Space Station and Atlantis

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Just a few days ago on Sept. 17, 2006, astronomer Thierry Legault in Normandie snapped an astonishing photograph (scroll down for the big view) showing the International Space Station and the detached shuttle Atlantis silhouletted against the full solar sphere. Absolutely jaw-droppingly beautiful and humbling. Mind boggling.  You have to see it to believe it.  Really.
(Thanks to Joe G. for the foreward.)

This Is Your Drugs on Brains

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By way of Danelope, I learned of this astonishing wire news story from Vermont, evocative of the Harry Anslinger “Gore File” tales of old. (Read some of Anslinger’s testimony and documents here.) But unlike Anslinger’s notoriously fictitious claims, I’m afraid this one appears to be genuine. I’ve tracked down the original story (and the photo) from the local Vermont paper, and archive them here for future…something. As I read it I couldn’t help thinking, “Too bad this kid’s last name isn’t Limbaugh.”

Source: The Caledonian-Record (St. Johnsbury, Vermont)
Thursday June 29, 2006
http://www.caledonianrecord.com/pages/top_news/story/288fc020c

Grave Robber Sentenced

By James Jardine, Staff Writer

ST. JOHNSBURY VERMONT — A Morrisville teenager who broke into a tomb and used a hacksaw to cut the head off of a corpse was sentenced Wednesday afternoon to 1 to 7 years in prison.

Photo of Nickolas Buckalew, convicted of sawing the head off a corpse to make a bong out of it.Nickolas Buckalew, 18, (pictured at right) pleaded guilty in Caledonia District Court to a felony charge of intentionally removing or injuring a tombstone and a felony charge of intentionally disinterring and carrying away the remains of a human body.

The Lamoille County case was transferred to the Caledonia courthouse in St. Johnsbury after a waterline failure left the Hyde Park courthouse without water.

On April 8, 2005, Buckalew went to a cemetery on the Washington highway in Morrisville and broke into an above-ground tomb, opened the lid of a casket and cut off the head of a corpse. He wrapped the head in plastic bags and took it home. He also stole eyeglasses and a bow tie from the corpse.

Buckalew told witnesses he intended to leave the severed head out and would then bleach it, according to the affidavit of Senior Patrolman Ryan Bjerke of the Morristown Police Department. He told witnesses he intended to turn the skull into a bong, which is a type of pipe used to smoke marijuana or other drugs.

After removing the head from the corpse, Buckalew went to an apartment house where he told residents of an apartment what he had done and that he had done the crimes because he was bored, according to police, who did not identify the witnesses because they are juveniles.

Buckalew was described by witnesses as “Gothic,” wearing all black clothing with spiked hair.

Witnesses went to the tomb to see if Buckalew did as he claimed and they looked through holes in the tomb and saw that the lid had been removed from a casket and there was a headless body in the casket.

On April 9 at 2:45 p.m., Morristown police executed a search warrant at Buckalew’s residence located at [address deleted] in Morrisville. They found a human head wrapped in bags, a necktie, a hacksaw, crowbar, garden trowel and two small parts of the damaged casket.

During Wednesday afternoon’s sentencing hearing, Judge Dennis Pearson upheld the plea agreement between the state and the defendant and sentenced Buckalew to a total of 1 to 7 years to serve in prison. Buckalew was given credit for the 14 months he’s served in prison awaiting trial. He will be sent to [facility name deleted], a therapeutic community residential treatment program, where he will obtain intensive counseling for mental health issues. He will remain there for an indeterminate period under a conditional community reentry program. He will be in the custody of the Department of Corrections for up to seven years under the conditional reentry program.

Dr. Philip Kinsler, a clinical psychologist and adjunct assistant professor of psychiatry at the Dartmouth Medical School in Hanover, N.H., testified that Buckalew suffered from a bipolar disorder that was described as “biologically based mental illness.” He testified learning from Buckalew that “he has always felt extraordinarily out of place” and that Buckalew told him that in the fourth grade he attempted to hang himself.

The witness told the court Buckalew also engaged in self-mutilation behavior.

Dr. Kinsler told the court “the defendant can be rehabilitated” and that he supported the plan to place Buckalew at [the residential treatment program] for treatment.

Buckalew, with a short haircut and wearing black framed glasses, was dressed in a light brown suit. He was quiet and expressionless throughout the hearing. At the end of the hearing, he addressed the court saying, “It was a horrendous thing that I did — what I did was appalling.” He told the court, “I didn’t think of the victim.” Buckalew told the court: “I want to get help for my mental problems.”

You Are What You Eat…You Poor Bastard

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For anyone who grew up in the Midwest, James Lileks’ Gallery of Regrettable Food will bring back memories of being forced to sit at the table until you eat all of your over-boiled canned vegetables and scary meat.

While cruising down Midwestern mastication memory lane, you’ll want to pull off and make a stop at the White Castle Recipes site. Sup like a fallen king on dubious delights like White Castle Souffle, Stubby’s 3-Cheese Spinach (and White Castle) Quiche, Castle Balls (hmmm), and (shudder) Castle Cobbler.

And assuming you’re still clinging to life after such a malicious meal, you’ll definitely need to partake of Recipes of the Damned. Fruit Cocktail-SPAM Buffet Party Loaf — need I say more?

And to think sushi once scared me…

Update: As a public service, because obesity is such a problem these days, I am obliged to refer you, dear gustinaut, to these Weight Watchers recipe cards from 1974. These are definitely your tickets to immediate weight loss. Mostly by aversion therapy. The last time I saw a Frankenfurter Spectacular, I threw toast at the screen.

Fluffy Mackeral Pudding!